Post-Transfer Day #3, January 31, 2010
Dexamethasone tablet (1 tablet in the AM)
Folic Acid supplement
Prenatal Vitamin
E2V Progesterone Suppository (1 before bedtime)
Progesterone injection (50 mg in the PM)

Back to work tomorrow. I'm not going to know how to behave. I've spent more time asleep this weekend than awake. It's been great.

Keith and I have been wondering when I'll start showing signs of being pregnant, if in fact, I'm pregnant. Yesterday afternoon, I spent some time googling the subject. Some of what I discovered was encouraging, especially considering some of the twinges I've been feeling. Here is some of what I found.

• Most women do not experience any symptoms of pregnancy until two weeks after ovulation (in my case, this would be around the time of my second blood test on February 10.)
• Some symptoms experienced by women prior to POSITIVE blood tests after IVF: cramping, pelvic twinges, breast tenderness, spotting, and fatigue. These symptoms, however, are also side effects of the progesterone injections.
• Implantation can occur between six and ten days after ovulation (which for me would be between Friday and Tuesday.)
• There is no way to predict success based on a missed period. From everything I read, women's cycles are completely off schedule after the hormone injections.

I found an interesting fact regarding assisted hatching, which is what was done to our embryo to help it along because the outer layer (zona pellucida) surrounding our embryo was slightly thicker than normal. Assisted hatching can increase the likelihood of identical twins.

I have a fullness in my lower stomach tonight....not as many twinges as yesterday. I could sleep at a moment's notice. Keith's been working the day shift this weekend, so he has been going to bed around 8:00 pm. I've been going to bed at the same time he does and sleeping until at least 8:00 the next morning. I took a two hour nap yesterday and today.

I've been alot more at peace today than yesterday. Something I read on an IVF discussion board I frequent hit home. In regards to a woman's desperate post about the agony of waiting the long ten days for the blood test, a woman posted "we are pregnant until proven otherwise." That's my motto for the next week......I am pregnant until proven otherwise.

Post-Transfer Day #2, January 30, 2010
Dexamethasone tablet (1 tablet in the AM)
Folic acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin
**New** Progesterone Suppository (in the PM before bed)
Progesterone injection (in the PM)

The question is "How do I feel?"

I wish I knew the answer to that. How DO I feel? Is that a twinge? Is that a pain? Is that bloating or fullness I'm feeling? Is that a baby in there? Is it normal for my back to hurt? Seems like it should be, considering I've been on my back 90% of the time since transfer.

I've somehow got to keep from running myself absolutely insane between now and next week. One minute, I am so positive. The next minute, I'm totally opposite of positive. Then, I regret not being positive. Keith, on the other hand, is completely positive it has worked. I am being way too hyper-sensitive about every little ache, pain, twinge, and hiccup. I sneezed for the first time a minute ago, and this image came into my head of the baby being jarred to the point of unattaching. Insane, I know.

Meanwhile, it is 10:00 AM on Saturday, and I am not out of bed yet. Keith's at work, it's way too cold, and what do I have to do anyway besides laundry? I got up long enough to walk the girls and make coffee and then back to bed we went. I really need to go in to the office and work some either today or tomorrow, but I may not. My instructions were modified bedrest for the first 24 hours. Sit or lay with brief breaks to go to the bathroom or eat. No driving, but riding home in the car would be fine. My 24 hours were up yesterday at 3 pm. My restrictions until after the pregnancy tests are no heavy lifting of anything over 10 lbs, no exercise, and no sex. All Mom wants me to do is sit still and quiet with my hands in my lap until next week. I'm to the point where I feel like doing just that.

Transfer Day, January 28, 2010

Dexamethasone (1 tablet in the AM)

Prenatal vitamin

Folic Acid

Progesterone injection (in the PM)

**no E2V suppository tonight....will begin Progesterone suppository tomorrow night.**

Keith and I just split the best piece of cheesecake ever made, complete with white chocolate and strawberry sauce. We were too full tonight after our steak at Saltgrass, so we ordered dessert to go.

What a day! We arrived at the clinic at 2:30 and was taken back for my normal "get undressed and put on the gown with the opening in the back" routine. Keith kept me cracked up today. As he was helping with my gown, he said "well, Victoria doesn't have any more Secrets, does she?" That IS the truth. I've been naked with my legs in stir-ups far too much lately. And hopefully, I'll have many more sets of stir-ups in my future.

The lab tech came in and gave us an update on the two embryos. One had completely stopped growing at 9 cells. The other was growing slowly but was still of good quality. She said if it were to be left another few hours that it would probably start hatching and turning into a blastocyst, so she said she would go into the lab and attempt to "help it along" before transfer.

Here is a picture of our sweet little embryo before the transfer.

Once we were taken to the transfer room (Keith got to go back with me today,) the lab tech and Dr. Saleh came in. The tech said she looked at both embryos again. The bad news was the 9 cell embryo was still not growing and had not changed at all in two days. The other one, however, had successfully started hatching and was in early blast stage. From what I have read, the embryo has a better chance of attaching when at this early blast stage because this is the stage the embryo is naturally in when it reaches the uterus during natural conception. Dr. Saleh said he did not like to transfer embryos that are no longer growing. It can sometimes hinder the good one from attaching. So with this, we went with his advice and only transferred the one happy embryo. The process was really miraculous. Dr. Saleh was guided by ultrasound. I kept my eyes closed most of the time trying to relax and stay calm. Keith watched the ultrasound screen the whole time. After the catheter was placed, Dr. Saleh guided the embryo in through the catheter. Keith saw a white dot shoot across the screen. He said "was that it???!" It was! Dr. Saleh turned the screen around and explained to us what were looking at.....the uterus, the lining, and there it was.....the small white dot. Right where it needed to be, he said.

God provides us with exactly what we need, with the amount we need, when we need it. No more, no less. This experience was a perfect example of Him providing. We began with five eggs, two fertilized, and we transferred one. It only takes one. He only needs one.

I feel really good tonight. I keep thinking I feel "twinges." Keith said it's probably just in my head. Dr. Saleh said I shouldn't have any cramping from the transfer. So far, I haven't. I thought at first I was feeling some cramping while we were in the holding area after the transfer, but I'm still sore from the retrieval. I think that is what I was feeling. Either that, or as Keith thinks, it's the embie in there hanging on going "weeeeeeeeee!!!!"

We'll be coming home tomorrow. I had a great nap this afternoon, so I hope I'm able to sleep well tonight.

Here is a picture of me prior to transfer. I'm still not any more fond of these hair net hat things than I was in July. But in my opinion, my butterfly earrings added a nice touch. I started to post the first picture Keith took. My earrings were tucked in my hat. When I realized that, I made him take another picture.

Post-Retrieval Day #4, January 27, 2010
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM ----but I took it tonight.)
Prenatal vitamin
Folic acid supplement
E2V (Estriadiol) Suppository (in the PM before bed)
Progesterone injection (in the PM)

I have a song to sing. I've been singing all day. Singing in my car. Singing at my desk at work and getting funny looks. I even went to choir practice tonight and had a blast. Tomorrow is the "Big T" Day! I e-mailed Titi today to see if I should be expecting a report on the embies today and if we were still on schedule for tomorrow. All she said was we're still on for tomorrow. So, no news must be good news in this case.

It's hard to believe this is all about to come to an end. I certainly won't miss the injections and other drugs.

We're leaving at 8:00 in the morning. Our appointment is at 2:30 tomorrow. We're spending the night and coming home Friday. Keith made a reservation for us at the Hyatt. Mom's staying with the girls. I wanted her to go, and I think she really wanted to go, but I hate for her to use all of her vacation time this early on. We won't like it, but we'll survive.

I'm very behind. I bought my pineapple and walnuts today, but I have yet to cut up the pineapple. I want to eat some before bed and some for breakfast in the morning, then take the rest of it with us to Dallas. I still have to pack. I'm so tired of packing and unpacking. I really wanted to paint my fingernails and toes tonight, but it's not looking like that's going to happen.

Signing off from the 612 for a couple of days.....will post from the Big D tomorrow.

*~*~~*Loves and hugs and happy sticky floating sparkling baby vibes!!!*~*~~*

Post-Retrieval Day #3 (ONLY ONE MORE DAY TIL TRANSFER)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal Vitamin
Folic acid supplement
E2V (Estriadiol) Suppository (in the PM before bedtime)
Progesterone injection (in the PM)

Dr. Saleh e-mailed me great news this morning about our embryos. They are still growing! And they are of "average" quality. Whatever. They are perfect. Keith says we will not say average. They are exceptional. They are miracles. And they are perfect.


The doctor's e-mail read "The embryos are still growing and are of average quality. We will know more in a couple of days. Hoping for the best." He also printscreened an embryology report in his e-mail. The chart looked something like this (only in rows and columns):

Day 3
Grade 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 >10
I
II
III
TOTAL

The number "2" was in the 6 column and II row. So what does this mean?

I did some research on blastocysts after this e-mail. Amazingly, I recognized some of the terminology from high school biology class. Upon conception, an embryo is one-celled. After 12 - 15 hours, it splits into two. After another 12- 15 hours it doubles yet again into four. Going by these guidelines, if my embies are at 6 cells on Day 3, they are normal.

I read tonight on some discussion boards that eating pineapple, either fresh or canned, and walnuts between retrieval day and transfer day may help increase the chance of implantation. It just so happens, I've been eating fresh pineapple all week. Yay for me. I plan on buying another tomorrow and stock up on the walnuts. I've also read that getting a massage on the day before or the day of transfer is recommended. My cousin, Amanda, e-mailed me an outline of different Dallas activities to consider during our trip Thursday, and one of them was a massage. I do believe I'll call tomorrow. Hopefully, I can schedule a short-notice appointment.

I'm planning on calling the clinic tomorrow to check on the embies. I'm sure the staff is sick of me by now, but I don't care.

I found a picture online of what a Day 3 embryo looks like. This happens to be an 8 cell.

The Happy Couple

Post-Retrieval Day #2, January 25, 2010
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Antiobiotic tablet - last day of antiobiotic
Folic Acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin
E2V (Estriadiol) Suppository (in the PM before bedtime)
Progesterone injection (in the PM)

We have two embryos! Dr. Saleh called home at 8:45 this morning with the news. Keith was asleep when the phone rang. He gave me word for word details....that is, as best as he can handle word for word details. He's not much of a detail man, but he did well this morning. According to Dr. Saleh, the other three eggs were not mature enough or of high enough quality to fertilize. I had a feeling this would be the case but remained hopeful for all five.

We will get an embryo quality and cell report tomorrow either by phone or e-mail. We're hoping for GRADE A quality!!! The higher the quality, the greater the success rate. Rates mean nothing to me really. If God wants it to work, it will work. All we need is one. And we have two. Praise the Lord!

Mom helped me with my Progesterone injection tonight since Keith is working. She did an excellent job! She was just alittle nervous, but she didn't have any trouble with it at all.

My ovaries feel just flat out sore and tired tonight. I think I'm putting them to bed now.

Looking forward to posting more good news tomorrow....

*~* Happy Sticky Growing Loving Sparkly Fun and Sweet Embie Vibes!!!*~*

Post-Retrieval Day #1, January 24, 2010
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Antibiotic tablet
(2 tablets daily
Folic Acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin
E2V (Estradiol) suppository (in the PM before bed)
Progesterone injection (in the PM)

Dr. Saleh didn't call us today. I've been waiting by the phone since waking up this morning! I have barely gone outside to walk the girls. I have tried to stay busy. I've washed alot of laundry. I cooked spaghetti and garlic bread for lunch. I baked a chess pie. I watched useless and boring television. I worked several Suduko puzzles. I took a couple of naps. I attempted to call SIRM thinking just MAYBE someone will answer the phone. I've checked my work voicemail. I've checked e-mail. Did Titi write my contact number down wrong? Did Dr. Saleh forget today was Sunday and wouldn't be going in to the office? Was he abducted by blue IVF hating aliens? I just don't know! In the words of one of my favorite co-workers, it is what it is. Some, all, or none of the eggs are fertilized at this moment, regardless if I know or not. As soon as the Worst Chef in America goes off, I'm going to bed and putting this day out of its misery. I will find out tomorrow.

Day #30, January 23, 2010
Dexamethasone
Prenatal vitamin
Folic acid supplement
Antiobiotic (twice daily)
E2V (Estriadiol) suppository (in the PM before bedtime)
*NEW* Progesterone intramuscular injection (1 ml in the PM) - hormone normally produced after ovulation, needed to prepare for embryo implantation.

I'm posting tonight from my couch at 612! Home at last! What an exciting week it's been....definitely one Keith and I will remember for the rest of our lives. We are thrilled to be home.

Egg retrieval went well this morning. We arrived at the clinic at 9:30 as instructed. Almost immediately, Titi called us back. Keith and I were led to one of the prep rooms. There were a few forms for us to sign before the procedure, and the anesthesiologist was there to discuss his part. I chose to opt out of anesthesia during the procedure to avoid having to go into the hospital's OR. I didn't lose that dang 12 pounds I've been fretting about. And due to those steroids I've been taking everyday, I've gained about 10 more. That's another story for another day, and right now, I couldn't care less what I weigh. Instead of being asleep for the procedure, I was only given oxygen and a mild, short-lasting medication in an IV that was administered periodically throughout the procedure, which lasted a total of about 10 minutes. It was no picnic. I shall not sugar-coat. But then again, no one ever said it wouldn't hurt when my ovaries were punctured. It could've been worse, I'm sure. The worst part was the initial stab, which came after I was asked to take a deep breath and cough hard. My blood pressure got somewhat high during the procedure, but it came right down as soon as it was over. Dr. Saleh called me courageous and seemed very impressed that I was able to make it thru all five follicles. It was obvious from their reactions that this was a rare occurrance. I keep telling Keith and Mom that when I do get pregnant and am delivering, I may just ask the doctor to step aside while I deliver my own baby. I do believe after all of this, it would be a cake walk.

I recovered for about 20 minutes afterwards in the holding area. My blood pressure and temperature was monitored, and ahhhhhh......Mary (one of the IVF nurses) brought me a cold diet coke. I met Mary for the first time on Thursday. She is an RN from SIRM-St Louis and has been in Dallas this week helping out with retrievals. Around 11:30, we were leaving the office and on our way to Denny's. I was starving. (Or as Mom called it...."Dendy's.")

I can't brag enough about the staff and Dr. Saleh at SIRM-Dallas. I have not dealt with anyone there that I felt didn't know me personally. We feel so taken care of and cared about while we are there. We know everyone there is rooting us on and wanting the absolute best for us. It has definitely been worth the distance and driving. I would recommend them to anyone.

Dr. Saleh will be calling us tomorrow with a report on how many of the five fertilized. We are praying for all five eggs tonight to be five growing embryos tomorrow! I feel disconnected tonight in a way. All of the hours and time and medication and injections to get those little eggs to where they are....they are mine. And to think about them being all alone in a dark lab so many miles away tonight sort of makes me sad. That is probably silly to think that way. We should receive yet another phone call on Tuesday with a full embryo report about the grade quality and cell numbers of the embryos. So, now, we're waiting for the phone to ring. I wanted to go to church tomorrow, but I don't think I'll be leaving until I hear from Dr. Saleh.

We were on our way home from Dallas by 12:30. It rained most of the way home. I was given something right before I left the clinic for pain that made me sleep very well the whole way home. We made it home around 6:00. The girls were happy to see us. And we were even happier to see them.

It was great having Mom and Mike with us. They drove in Friday and drove back with us today. We had a great night with them last night. Keith drove us into Plano to a nice mall. Mom and I shopped in Macy's for almost two hours, while Keith and Mike explored the rest of the mall. Mom and I both bought us a comfortable outfit for the doctor's appointment. Mom also bought a purse in the mall that is quite lovely. We ate at Saltgrass Steakhouse before returning to our rooms. All I have to say about that place is YUM!!!! That was the absolute best steak I've ever had.....a great way to start my no food/no drink fasting. Speaking of fasting, I may try my hand again at that in the next few days in an attempt to get some of these extra pounds off.

To all of our friends and family who are keeping up with us on our blog and Facebook, we love you. We would not be doing as well as we are without your support and prayers. God has been and continues to comfort us and give us the strength we need to make it through this each day...even when we're tired or hormonal or worried or anxious. He is there.

*~*Baby dust and vibes and loves for Our Fabulous Five!*~* ........

Day #29, January 22, 2010
Dexamethasone (1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal Vitamin
Folic Acid Supplement
E2V Suppository
*NEW* (started this one yesterday) Azithromycin (antibiotic) - 1 tablet in the AM - in preparation for egg retrieval.




This list of medication is alot shorter! It was so great no having to stick myself this morning. The trigger shot went well at midnight last night. Keith did a great job. He's sleeping in this morning, and I've been up enjoying the quiet.

We had a nice evening last night. We decided to actually make a plan and go out. Absolutely nothing has been "planned" while in Dallas this week, so being the control freak that I am, it was refreshing to actually have a plan. There is an IMAX theatre a few blocks over, and since Keith has never experienced an IMAX movie, we decided that's what we would do, especially since AVATAR was playing in 3D. We've both been wanting to see it. It was a great movie...by far, one of the best ones I've seen in awhile. Although there were some details I personally didn't agree with (praying to trees, Eywa, nature, and the forest, for instance) it was still a great story of good vs. evil. The imagery was amazing. Sigourney Weaver played in the movie, which was a surprise to both of us. I loved her in the Alien movies.

I feel good today, and I'm very excited about retrieval day tomorrow. And I'm looking forward to heading back home tomorrow too. I miss Molly and Maggie SO MUCH! I'm having some mild discomfort on my left side and lower back today, but I'm hoping that's just the follicles continuing to grow.

Joy times FIVE...

Day #28, January 21, 2010
Ganirelix injection - THE LAST ONE!
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal vitamin
Folic acid supplement
**NEW** HcG INJECTION - TRIGGER SHOT - intramuscular @ 12 AM midnight
NO MORE STIMS - Follistim, Menopur, or E2V Suppository

Well, he said it with a smile on his face. The words we were hoping for....."You are ready for retrieval." On the right ovary, I have three follicles measuring 20, 19, and 16 mm. On the left ovary, I have two small follicles measuring 13 and 11. While these two are considered immature, he will still retrieve them and hope they fertilize. He did not want to push me any further in fear of losing the two large follicles. They could either turn into cysts, or I could ovulate Neither of those would be good scenerios. Dr. Saleh said he feels completely confident that this was the absolute best my body could possibly do, considering the fact I have been taking the maximum dosage of stimulating hormone. He said he is very familiar with far worse cases and proven successful. I am delighted. Yes, there could've been more. I've heard of some women having twenty or more eggs retrieved. But, I am pleased and so very thankful for my five. We trigger tonight at midnight with the HcG injection, which is intramuscular. We had to make a trip to Frisco today to buy one more vial of the HcG because Dr. Saleh decided to up the trigger shot dosage to 15000 units instead of the normal 10000. Apparently, the trigger shot also helps to mature the eggs, and he wants to give them one final nudge. This means the eggs could be even larger by Saturday.

Mom and Mike are driving in tomorrow after Mike's bus route in the morning. I'm excited to see them. I've been missing them and home alot today.

So, what's next? Our appointment Saturday is at 9:30. From what I understand, we'll be there for about three hours. I've chosen to undergo the procedure without anesthesia and instead go in with only morphin and Tylenol. I'm a tough cookie, and I'd rather opt out of the anesthesia than be out another $350 for the use of the hospital OR. Once the eggs have been retrieved, it will be Keith's turn. What a trooper he is! We're free to return home after retrieval. We will get a fertilization report, I believe, three days later (which would be Tuesday.) Hopefully, our eggs will be on their way to becoming embryos by this day and continue growing up to day five, which is next Thursday.

We are no where near finished. We have a long way to go. So much could go right, and so much could go wrong. This crazy road we're on is still winding, and we're still hanging on for dear life praying every step of the way. Our prayers now are for the five follicles to continue doing well, then for all of them to fertilize, and then for them to grow grow grow into sweet little embryos to transfer next Thursday.

Concerning how I feel, ehh. Today has been emotionally draining. I feel like a stuffed toad frog. I've cried alot. I cried after my exam. I cried in IKEA earlier today. I cried during AVATAR tonight. And honestly, I almost cried just now because the chicken sammich I just ate from Burger King was overcooked. As Keith said, as long as they are tears of joy, we're good. And today, they were. Keith has been amazing this week. I look and feel completely unattractive. I can't button my blue jeans, so I've been wearing my gray stretchy pants most of week, which I'm going to launder tomorrow for retrieval day. My stomach is bruised and ugly, not to mention fat and bloated. And yet he still calls me beautiful. I guess that means he loves me. We've had alot of fun this week waiting. Every day we spend together brings us one step closer to that bundle of joy we're so anxious to meet.

Day #26 and Day #27, January 19 and 20, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal vitamin
Folic acid supplement
E2V (Estriadiol) suppository in the PM before bedtime
Follistim injection
(375 units in the PM)
Menopur injection
(1 vial in the PM)

I've officially turned into a pin-cushion. These injections are getting old. I hesitate to complaint because I know it is all for a grand cause.

I didn't make it back to the computer last night to post a blog, so today's is two days in one. We had a nice day yesterday exploring Downtown Dallas. We decided to take the DART train downtown so Keith could have a break from driving and could actually see the scenes. It was an experience. For $5, we each could ride as much as we wanted to anywhere the trains would go on any of the trains or busses. We saw all kinds of characters. One woman I sat next to on the train was reading a book called "Fatal Feng Shui."

We visited the Crow Museum of Asian Art. There were some beautiful things there that I could appreciate. My favorite area of the museum was the Oragami area. We learned to make two different kinds of flowers. Neither one we made ended up looking exactly right, but I hung mine proudly on the colorful wall of paper flowers created by past visitors. We took alot of pictures. I will post them later. We ate lunch at a small cafe in the Dallas Museum of Art. The lady behind the counter upsold us just about everything offered there, and we ended up going from splitting an $8.25 deli sammich and chips to $22 of soup, chili, sandwich, drinks, and dessert.

We found our train station and travelled back to Forest Lane station where we had parked. I was completely exhausted from all of the walking, so we returned to the room, and I slept for three hours. We decided to go to Dave and Busters last night for dinner and fun. We had a nice time. The blackened chicken pasta was great, but I was somewhat disappointed about not getting salad or bread with my dinner. I asked the waitress about halfway through my meal if the pasta wasn't supposed to come with bread. She said "it comes with a dinner roll, would you like one?" Well yeah. If it comes with it, why wasn't it on my plate to begin with? She brought out two hot rolls with butter that were simply divine. Too bad I was almost full. Keith got chicken tenders and fries, and we both ended up with leftovers.

Overall, I feel good. After Dave and Busters last night, we rode out to the other side of Dallas to explore. I was pretty tired by the time we made it back to our room and was just plain grumpy and snappy. Realizing I was being grumpy and snappy made me feel guilty and weepy. Argh. Hormones! I slept great though and feel wonderful this morning. Keith is up and ready to go. We will probably head to Grapevine today since we didn't do that yesterday. It turned out to be a beautiful day yesterday with no rain in site until around 11:00 last night. I haven't looked out today, but there was about a 30% chance of isolated thunderstorms in today's forecast.

Day #25, January 18, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Folic Acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin
E2V (Estradiol) suppository in the PM
Follistim injection
(375 units in the PM)
Menopur injection
(1 vial in the PM)

Wow, what a day!!! It has been awhile since 4:00 this morning when this day first started. We made it to Dallas around 10:00 this morning and checked into our room before our appointment. We are happy with where we are staying. It is a small and no frills kind of place, but it's cozy and perfect for us. It has a full size refrigerator, small dinette set, microwave, and two burner electric stovetop. The bed is a little squeeky, but it's not hard as a rock. We took a lovely afternoon siesta on it after lunch today.

Now for the most important part of this post: our appointment. It was at 11:15 this morning. We arrived early to a full waiting room of familiar faces. Most every woman that was there during my last doctor's visit was also there today. We didn't have to wait long. Heather took me back to draw blood, then came back for both of us about 10 minutes later for my exam. Dr. S saw two good sized follicles on the right ovary, measuring 11.5 mm and 13.5 mm. From what I have read tonight, a 19 - 20 mm follicle is considered a mature follicle. Dr S. could not see any measureable follicles on the left ovary, but he said "there are many in the making." My uterine lining is 9, which anything >9 is considered good (according to what I've read tonight.) Of course, I couldn't think of a single question to ask him at the time, so I've been Googling my questions tonight. I still have alot of questions, so I'm planning on calling Titi tomorrow. We met briefly with Heather to get further instructions on meds after the exam. My only question at that time was "is it normal to not be ready for retrieval yet?" She said that no one is ever ready for retrieval on the first day of monitoring, so that made me feel better. She also said quality is more important than quantity, so Dr. S would rather have 5 great eggs rather than 20 so-so eggs. Everything I've read online tonight said slow growing follicles are better than fast growing ones. I just pray I continue progressing.

Dr. S instructed me to keep taking my meds as usual and come back on Thursday for another check. If I'm ready then, I'll take my trigger shot Thursday night and go in for retrieval 36 hours later on Saturday. This is not exactly the schedule either of us was expecting, but when has my life ever turned out as scheduled or expected? Answer: Never. We discussed getting up in the morning and driving home, since we don't have to be back at the doctor until Thursday. We decided to stay. I miss the girls like crazy, but I know Mom's taking excellent care of them. I'd rather stay put for the next few days and try to enjoy our time rather than keep the road hot for the next three days. We have our room for the week anyway.

We bought a camera yesterday. I'll try to post some pictures tomorrow. I am probably going to run short on meds since I've got to continue taking them this week. Heather said there is a local pharmacy in Plano that fills IVF drugs, so it shouldn't be a problem getting some refills. I will be calling her tomorrow to discuss the meds further and ask the following: What if a follicle gets TOO big? I'm concerned about those two on the right side. What does my lining need to be at? What were the results of my bloodwork today?

Keith is already out. He's tired. He tried to sleep on the way up here this morning but wasn't very successful. He took a three hour nap this afternoon that seemed to make him feel alot better. I'm tired too. Going to go finish up my meds for the day and turn in. We are planning on driving to Grapevine tomorrow since it's supposed to rain most of the day.

The Big D Big Week is here.

Day #24, January 17, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal vitamin
Folic acid supplement
E2v (Estriadiol) suppository in the PM before bedtime
Follistim injection
(375 units in the PM)
Menopur injection
(1 vial in the PM)



Our first main week of IVF fun has arrived. In less than ten hours, we'll be on our way to Dallas for an unknown amount of time, preparing for monitoring and egg retrieval. IVF meds are boxed and ready to be iced down. Laundry detergent and groceries are sacked up and ready to go. Both suitcases are packed full. Keith is working tonight and will be home just in time to hit the road at 4:00 in the morning.


Some have asked if I'll be posting updates this week. I'll be packing up my laptop once I finish up the blog for tonight and will post here and Facebook each day. As of now, I have no idea how next week will go. The one thing I DO know for sure is our appointment is at 11:15 tomorrow. Other than that, I have no idea what is to come. But, here is a brief breakdown of the possibilities. One of these scenerios is guaranteed to happen tomorrow, this I know....



1. At our appointment tomorrow, Dr. S could say "you're ready for retrieval in the morning."

2. At our appointment tomorrow, Dr. S could say "looking great, but you're not ready for retrieval. We'll check again tomorrow." (and possibly the next day and the next day and the next day, etc. etc. etc.)



And there is always a possibility dreaded #3 could happen.....

3. At our appointment tomorrow, Dr. S could say "hmmmmmmmm......not seeing anything happening....not good."

It would be great knowing exactly what to expect. But the truth is, we don't. We can only do what we've been doing....pray and hope and hope and pray that I am responding well to the meds, and my body is reacting exactly the way it should.



Ok, enough about the "what-ifs." Here are few of my latest favorite food finds....

I'm not one for canned soups, but I like Campbell's Healthy Selects, particularly the Savory Sausage and Vegetables. I recommend a grilled cheese on the side. This soup doesn't taste the least bit like a can, and the vegetables taste fresh. Josh and Keith even ate a bowl of this soup for lunch last Saturday and liked it. THAT says alot.



I am also not a big fan of applesauce, but I'm always looking for healthy and easy snacks to pack for work. I discovered Mott's Mango Peach Applesauce last week. Oh yum. It's probably the mango peach part of it that tastes so good to me. The best part are the individual servings that fit great in my insulated lunch bag. I could eat two at a time, but I wouldn't recommend that considering the sugar content is way up there at 21 grams per serving.



I love my morning coffee. Murphy Oil coffee seems to be getting worse by the day. Just when I think it can't get worse, it does. It's to the point now where I simply do not believe it's coffee but more like a diluted brown water mixture of some sort. It doesn't even smell good. I would love to be able to bring my own personal coffee pot for my cubicle, but since I can't, I've been bringing my own BIG cup of coffee from home. Making coffee at home is an inconvenience. Cleaning the filter is messy, I tend to forget to clean the pot, and I just about always forget to set the automatic timer the night before (usually because I forget to clean it.) This means I must take time in the mornings to wash the pot and make my coffee. But like the trooper I am, I do it anyway....and this wonderful product makes it well worth the effort: International Delight Coffee Creamer. It comes in the most spectacular flavors, including White Chocolate Mocha, Vanilla Latte, and Caramel Macchiato (my personal favorite.) It's sheer delight in a cup. I've been trying to figure out a way to take my creamer with me to Dallas. I've decided I'll be stopping by a grocery store once we're settled because I don't desire to spend one day without it.



Tomorrow's blog posting will be from our hotel room in Dallas. I'm signing out from Parkers Chapel Road. As Keith said this morning, "we're gonna go make us some babies!"

Thank you all for your unending thoughts and prayers for us. Please keep them coming. We are prepared for whatever the Lord has planned for us. The events of this week will surely set the stage for what is yet to come....

(*)~*(Sticky Happy and Blessed Baby Vibes for us this week(~(*(~)*)

Day #23, January 16, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Folic acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin
Follistim injection
(375 units in the PM)
Menopur injection
(1 vial in the PM)
E2V (Estriadiol) suppository in the PM before bedtime

I AM TIRED. I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO ENERGY AND HAVE HAD NONE TO SPEAK OF ALL DAY.

I haven't even accomplished anything today to be tired from. I made a quick trip to town this afternoon to Wal-mart, and I ran completely out of steam before getting out of there. As I sit here, I'm wondering how completely disgusting it would be to go to bed without taking a bath. And I'm also wondering how lame it would be if I were to go to bed at 7:00 pm. My belly feels like and looks like it's full of something. I'm without words to describe it. I noticed earlier it's a struggle to bend over. Yay for eggs! Oh please oh please oh please let there be lots of eggs.

Mom came over earlier and brought over a sweet surprise. She fixed us a care package for our trip next week, which included things like a new pair of pajamas for both myself and Keith, crackers, "squeeze cheese"( yum,) candy, crayons, coloring books, a new Sudoku book, magazines for us, and money for a tank of gas. Oh, how I love her. She's the best. She watched tonight as I took my last two injections for the day, the Menopur and Follistim.

I finished just about all laundry today. I'm going to pack tomorrow and finish up my cleaning.

Molly's feeling better, I think. She and Maggie are napping and have been playing alot today.

I'm getting hungry. I cooked a big lunch of macaroni and cheese, pintos, hot water cornbread, and mini chocolate pies. Maybe I'll eat leftovers.

If retrieval ends up happening during the first part of next week, and Keith and I end up making it home, we may try to make a trip to Vicksburg, MS or Tunica, MS, to see Aaron Lewis of Staind. We love his music (several of his songs are posted on our blog page.) He just kicked off his solo tour, and we've always said if he's ever within driving distance from us, we're there. He will be at the Ameristar Casino in Vicksburg on Thursday, January 21 and Friday, January 22, and at the Horseshoe in Tunica on Saturday, January 23. We have a much more important agenda next week, so I won't be devastated if we miss him this time. He'll be in Biloxi in March, so we may just have to take a birthday trip in the spring.

I realize this post is very random. I'm tired.

Day #22, January 15, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Folic acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin
E2V (Estriadiol) suppository (in the PM before bedtime
Follistim injection
(375 units in the PM)
Menopur injection
(1 vial in the PM)



This list of medication is officially long! Wow, this month has flown by! I can't believe in two days, we'll be on our way to Dallas for monitoring. Our first appointment is at 11:00 Monday morning. Keith works Sunday night, which means he'll make it home from work at 3:30 AM Monday morning. We've decided instead of him going to bed when he gets home, we're hitting the road. I'll be driving while he sleeps. Otherwise, with the way Keith sleeps, we'd never make it to Dallas on time because I wouldn't be able to wake him up when it's time to leave. It'll be nice getting out of town early. Hopefully that way, we can make it to Dallas in time to get checked into our room before our appointment.


As I've said many times before, we are looking forward to next week. The time together will be good for us. We've been studying up on economical things to do while we're there that won't break our bank. Our room has a full kitchen, so we'll be packing groceries, which is something completely out of norm for me. Going out of town to cook? And eat cereal for breakfast? I'm not sure exactly how I'm going to like that, but I'll live. Keith asked me tonight if I'd be interested in doing some geocaching while we're there. And of course I said YES. It's been so long since we've been able to go, so I'm planning on having my geocaching bag stocked and ready tomorrow to take with us next week.


One particular place we're looking forward to visiting while we're in Dallas is Dave and Busters. Oh, how I love that place. For someone like me who could stand in front of a big clear plastic box of 20 cent stuffed animals and a hook, while feeding money into it for hours, Dave and Busters is a lovely place to be. It's like a Chucky Cheese for grown-ups. Video games, hook machines, quarter machines, ski ball......Ahhhhhh!!! Pure and unadulterated bliss!!! I can thank Kristal from work for telling me about that place. Bless her heart, she still hasn't made it there yet!


Today turned into a very interesting day. After yesterday, anything would've been an improvement. Not that yesterday was that bad, but I guess I could say I was burdened. Work ended stressfully. I ate way too much. I was unusually weepy and sleepy and just wanted to be home in my pajamas most of the day. A co-worker and I attended a meeting this morning that ended very well and made us both feel like the work we do everyday actually has meaning. Some days, I wonder. But today, it mattered. We both knew it, and it felt great. It's amazing how a so-so blah day like yesterday could turn itself into the next, and end up showing a completely different face. I left work today at 1:30 to get my hair done, then went back tonight from 7:00 til 9:30. I'm doing my best to stay on top of work since I'll be out indefinitely next week. I'm tired and about to find me a "Play Now" movie on Netflix to watch and hopefully fall asleep to.

Day #21, January 14, 2010

Ganirelix injection

(125 mcg half dose in the AM)

Dexamethasone tablet

(1 tablet in the AM)

Folic acid supplement

Prenatal vitamin

E2V (Estradiol) suppository
Follistim injection

(375 units (change in dose) in the PM)

*New* Menopur injection

(mix 1 cc sodium chloride w/Menopur powder/inject all of solution subQ)

I skipped a day of posting. Gotta hate it when that happens. The good news is that I've not skipped days that often. After working a full day yesterday, going out to eat last night, and choir practice, I was way too tired by the time all of that was over to care about the blog. I missed it. It's amazing how many people have told me they're keeping up with us by reading it daily. We are so thankful for all of our caring friends and family.

I told Keith tonight he should do the posting for today. He declined because as he said, if he posted, it would go something like this: Amy took her shots today. They hurt. They're over for today. Goodbye.

It's been another very, very long day. I worked until 6:45 tonight, and Keith wanted to go out for dinner again tonight after I got home.

The girls both had spa days yesterday. Baths and nails. They look and smell great. They also went to the vet for their annual check and shots. Molly has tonsilitis again. She has always had an issue with swollen tonsils, especially in the winter months. Dr. Ralston prescribed her two weeks of antibiotics to get the swelling down, then we are to call back to make an appointment to have her tonsils taken out. She'll have to be asleep for the surgery, but he assured us it is a minor surgery that she should recover from quickly. Other than that, they are perfectly healthy, weighing in at 11.5 lbs (Maggie) and 8.5 lbs (Molly.)

We've decided to leave them home next week. Mom said she would take excellent care of them and even spend the night over here while we're away. I'm glad because I hate the thought of them being by themselves all night every night for so long. Mom and Mike decided they are coming to down to Dallas the day of egg retrieval. I am thrilled about that! Speaking of Dallas, our trip isn't far off now! I am so excited. My stomach has felt bloated today to the point of wishing I didn't have to wear pants. Being that I'm at work though, I don't have much of a choice. I wore a dress yesterday and just about froze. This is what we're hoping my ovaries are starting to look like. We are praying for lots of follicles because follicles house the eggs....

The new injection went well tonight. The most complicated injection by far, there were two different vials of medication to mix. I was glad when it was over. My stomach is starting to show signs of bruising in just about every spot there is to stick, and each injection gets alittle more painful by the day.

The mother hen is turning in for the night.

Day #19, January 12, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Folic acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin
E2V (Estriadiol) Suppository (before bedtime)
Follistim injection
(750 units in the PM between 4 -9 pm)

My eggs are crankin'! Oh my, or we could say they're cookin'. Or bakin'. Or boilin'. Even poaching! Whatever they're supposed to be doing, I pray they're doing it! Still feeling great! No odd or weird symptoms to report today.

I'm not having any luck getting the scale to go down. I'm not eating alot, but I'm not eating right, and I know this. I packed a lunchbox of healthy snacks this morning before leaving home.....graham crackers w/peanut butter, pineapple chunks, and toast w/a grilled link sausage for breakfast (which no, isn't healthy, but it's better than McDonalds.) With the exception of one graham cracker, my lunchbox was empty by 11:00 this morning. As I write this, my stomach is roaring. I think I have stuff to make spaghetti....and I think I have just enough time to cook before American Idol comes on.

Keith and I are both getting so excited about next week. I've been reading some articles online about ovary hyperstimulation. I e-mailed Titi this morning and asked her if there are any symptoms I should be watching for this week since I started the Follistim. She assured me I had nothing to worry about and that all monitoring would start next week.

We still haven't decided if we are or are not bringing the girls along with us. I found some neat seatbelt harnesses at Eppinette's tonight and bought two to try out. I worry they will be unhappy the whole way because they probably won't be able to see outside. I would rather they be unhappy and safe rather than all over the car. I wish there was such of a thing as a booster seat for dogs. Maybe there is?????

I never get tired of watching Seinfeld episodes. There will never be another George and Jerry.

George: "Jerry, did you wash this pear? It LOOKS like it hasn't been washed."
Jerry: "So, wash it."

Day #18, January 11, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal vitamin
Folic acid
E2V (Estradiol) suppository (before bedtime)
**New** Follistim injection (750 units in the PM between 4 - 9 PM)

I have a pounding headache. At first I thought it was because my pony tail was too tight, but I don't believe that's the case anymore. I took the new injection at around 6:30 this evening. Because the Follistim Pen will only inject 450 units at one time, I had to stick myself twice. And tonight, it hurt. After ten minutes or so, the injection site was still stinging and achy.

Hoarders and Intervention is on tonight. We're hanging out on the couch tonight with the girls. We just had a lovely snack of warm chocolate chip cookies and milk.

Did I mention I have a headache?

Day #17, January 10, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal Vitamin
Folic Acid Supplement
**New** E2V Pre-egg retrieval suppository in the PM before bed (possible side effects include dizziness, lightheadedness, upset stomach, bloating, nausea, and weight changes.)

I have nothing to report today other than it has been another good day. These hormones are lovely. I wake up in a good mood and go to bed in a good mood. If it wasn't for the dull headache I get right after the shot in the morning, and again around 2:00 every afternoon, I would dare say they are making me a better woman. Here's to estrogen. We shall see how I feel later this week once my ovaries start going haywire.

Tonight, I investigated the Follistim pen and cartridges to see if I understood everything before my first injection tomorrow night. I must admit I am nervous about it. The calendar states I am to inject 750 units, but the pen will only inject a maximum of 450 units at one time. So this means two sticks for this one injection. Keith said not to worry. We will handle it like the troopers we are. For now, we're going to call it a day and turn in early. It's an early day for him tomorrow....2:30 AM, and I have a big day at work ahead of me tomorrow too.

Keith made a funny over dinner earlier. I was telling him about my Facebook status messages lately and about including Baby Vibes 2010 on alot of them. I told him that my gut feeling about this whole thing is, if it works, I feel it's going to be multiples. He said "We'll have twins in twenty ten." That made me chuckle. I don't know why.

Goodnight, friends. Keep sending the sticky vibes, baby dust, and prayers our way.

a good day

Day #16, January 9, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Folic Acid supplement
Prenatal Vitamin

Here we are on Day #16 of our IVF cycle. I can't believe that we're over the half way mark. The days are flying by! One more week and we'll be gearing up for our week in The Big D. It took me three tries to take my shot this morning. I certainly hope the pharmacy sent extras because I botched two pre-filled syringes trying to get the stupid air bubble out.

I've been in the best mood today. I slept til 8:30 and was able to have about an hour of quiet time before the boys woke up. I cooked once they were up, and we talked over breakfast about what we wanted to do with our day. Keith decided he would work on the kitchen backsplash. I wanted to work outside, but it was just too dang cold. Keith and Josh got dressed and hit the road to Home Depot for a few last minute things Keith needed for the backsplash. Instead of going with them, I cleaned house. I even vaccuumed underneath the couch cushions. By the time they made it back, the house was spotless, and laundry was well under way. Since Keith was devoting his time to a house project, I decided to caulk the bathroom walls, baseboards, and ceiling. I worked on it for about two hours and didn't make a whole lot of progress. Keith ended up needing the caulking gun for the glue, so my project came to a hault.

Mom called about 6:30 tonight saying that her neighbor called about a pipe freezing under her house. The pipe burst, and water was flowing. She and her two daughters were home alone. Keith stopped his work and immediately went next door to turn off the water and try to fix the pipe. Once he realized he didn't have what he needed to complete the job, he made his second trip to Home Depot today, came back and made the repairs. As he said, we may need some extra help one of these days. It's always good to make friends with your neighbors. And I'm blessed and thankful to be married to a kind-hearted man. While he was away, I decided to fire up the charcoal grill, which was quite interesting, since I've never lit a charcoal grill. The fact that it was dark and 20 degrees outside only added to the drama. I grilled hamburgers, hot dogs, sausages, and baked some potatoes. To his pleasant surprise, he had a hot meal waiting for him after his good deed was done.

Now, we're watching a movie on TNT. Keith finally thawed out after a hot shower. The one tiny section of installed backsplash looks exceptionally wonderful. It's been a good day.

What kind of sense does that make?

Day #15, January 8, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Folic acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin
**Delestrogen intramuscular injection** 0.2 mcg in the PM between 4pm - 9pm

We just got home from eating pizza, and my stomach just growled. What kind of sense does that make?

Keith did a great job with the IM injection tonight. No problems whatsoever.

Keith and I enjoyed the afternoon together. Under-cabinet lighting has been our current house project, and we've run into a problem at finding the correct sizes. Over the last few weeks, we've shopped for them at Home Depot, Walmart, and Amazon. We decided to drive down to Lowe's in Ruston this afternoon to see what they offered. Miraculously, they had some that would've worked. But after calculating how much they were going to cost, Keith decided to leave them there. What kind of sense does that make?

We bought two birdhouses, birdseed, and a pendant light to over the bar in my kitchen instead. It just occurred to me about five minutes ago that I'm not fond of the color I chose and will probably return it. I absolutely hate it when I have moments like that. I'm standing there looking at all of the different colors, only after the red one is what caught my attention in the first place. So, after deliberating over the fifty or so different colors, I end up choosing a brownish yellow one. What??? My walls are a pale yellow. My living room furniture is a yellow-ish hue. My accents are red. I wanted the red one!!! Why did I leave the store with the yellow one? And again I ask, what kind of sense does that make??? I'm completely disgusted with myself.

Day #14, January 7, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Folic Acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin

Well, we finally did it. The Martindills are officially on a budget. In an effort to reduce stress in my life, I've turned the checkbook and bills over to Keith. It's been on our hearts for some time now to do our best to become a debt-free household. Keith had some time this week and broke the numbers out, and if all goes as planned (and those are very important words,) with the exception of our mortgage and my car, we will be debt free by December 2010. We are extremely excited about it, and we are prepared for some sacrifices along the way, but if we keep focused we will reach our goal, and the end result will be freeing.

Month-end close is officially over for December. We were all hoping for a snow day today, but upon waking to nothing on the ground except wet, our hopes quickly vanquished. It was another long day for me. I experienced what I believe was a hot flash this afternoon. I'm usually cold while at work, but this afternoon around 4:00, I got hot.....and I mean, "I'm about to come out of this turtleneck" hot. It quickly came and went, and I was back to normal in no time.

Keith's at work tonight, and I miss him.

Long Day

Day #13, January 6, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Folic Acid supplement
Prenatal vitamin

This morning started out at 5 AM with a pounding headache. My head felt as if I'd been hit by a truck sometime during the night. I changed my alarm to 7 AM and went directly back to bed, which put my day about two hours behind. With it being month-end close time at work, the day was very busy, and I worked until 6:30 tonight. After picking up and delivering supper to Keith at work, then choir practice, I finally made it home at 9:00 PM. Maggie apparently wasn't happy about being left home alone today. I came home to a living room floor full of white fuzzy stuffing....poor innocent blue stuffed unicorn never had a chance.

Other than a constant and dull headache, I feel quite good. My mood is liltingly lovely. I did notice today at work that my self-edit button appears to be unresponsive, and my inner monologue is vocalized before I'm fully aware of the words coming out of my mouth. I'm going to have to make a concious effort to work on that tomorrow. I've had no major meltdowns to speak of....with the exception of the small crying fit I pitched after the cupcake mess last Sunday. I've received some encouraging and caring e-mails lately from friends that have been touching and have brought a tear or two. I'm eager to see how I feel next week once the stimulating hormones begin.

I'm hoping and praying for a snow day tomorrow. I could make some good use of some couch time in my flannel pajamas. It is Arctic-cold outside!!!

He's eating cake.

Day #12, January 5, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Folic Acid supplement
Prenatal Vitamin
**NEW** Delestrogen IM injection
(0.2 mcg in the PM between 4pm - 9pm - intramuscular injection)

As Keith sits beside me enjoying his collapsed confection of cupcake, I'm eagerly awaiting my pajamas and pillow. I'm so tired! 5:00 AM arrived too early this morning after getting home at 10:30 last night from Dallas. Yesterday was a great day. We arrived for our appointment right on time after leaving at 4:30 yesterday morning. I decided to be extra sweet and offer to drive part of the way. I ended up driving all the way to Greenville. I actually enjoyed the drive. We ran into about a twenty minute delay outside of Texarkana around 6:30 when sleet started falling and freezing to the road. About four cars slid off a bridge and had traffic backed up. I never slid and was thankful for that.

There were three other ladies at the clinic yesterday, and I found out while I was there that we are all cycling this month. SHER keeps all of us on the same calendar, so our appointments are all around the same time. Our appointment was at 10:45, and at 11:30, we were still waiting for an exam room. They were nice enough to let us sit in the holding and education area where I enjoyed browsing the study material and free stuff. I found a neat cycle calendar, complete with stickers to mark meds, retrieval dates, etc. So neat. I loaded up my red carry-all with as much stuff as it could carry. The nurse drew my blood for an estrogen check.

Dr. Saleh was looking handsome in his pressed blue plaid Ralph Lauren finest. He is a man of few words, but he is so kind and caring. He pointed out my ovaries on the ultrasound machine and said they looked exactly as they should during this stage....resting and quiet....and there were no cysts. The entire exam lasted about five minutes. He said everything looked great, and he'd see us back on Cycle Day 9, January 18, at which time I'll have another ultrasound in hopes of seeing lots of eggs! We wrapped up the appointment after a brief meeting with our nurse, Titi. We had to sign all of consent forms yesterday for the ovarian stimulation, retrieval, transfer, egg freezing, and CGH testing. We decided to decline the CGH testing for several reasons. First of all, our insurance does not cover the testing. Second, Dr. Saleh didn't recommend it for us because of my possible poor egg quality. In short, CGH (comparitive genomic hybridization) testing is genetic and chromosome testing done on embryos to rate the embryos quality in an effort to transfer the absolute best embryos in hopes of a pregnancy. These tests check for chromosomal defects and other birth defects and dramatically reduce the incidents of chromosomal miscarriages. Being that the best embryos are chosen for transfer, this means fewer embryos are transferred, which results in fewer multiple births. The SHER Institute is so confident in this testing that if a patient qualifies for the program, they offer an IVF Refund Plan where they offer a complete refund of all fees involved if the IVF does not result in a live birth. We also had to sign a form giving the clinic permission to discard our embryos if I die, Keith dies, or we both die with embryos frozen at the clinic, or if more than a year goes by without them hearing from us or paying storage fees.

We left the clinic around noon yesterday and immediately found lunch. Keith wanted breakfast, so we hit the Cracker Barrel. I was utterly disgusted when I was brought chicken tenders instead of the chicken tenderloin I thought I was ordering with mashed potatoes, turnip greens, and cornbread. I'm not sure if I ordered wrong or it that's what they are calling chicken tenders now....chicken tenderloin. Right. There was not a thing "tenderloin" about those four whimpy pieces of chicken on my plate. Our waitress was rude. Keith dropped his fork on the floor before our food arrived. She rolled her eyes when he asked for another one. Needless to say, she didn't get a tip. I did find an excellent bargain in the gift shop though....a big brown floppy straw hat with stones around the brim. I have a straw hat already that I wear when doing yardwork, but it doesn't fit on my big head that well, and it tends to blow away with the slightest wind gust. This one seems to fit better, and it came home with me for the incredible price of $5. After a 45 minutes lightning quick stop at Sam Moon, we hit the road. I love Dallas. The traffic is crazy, and the city is hugely overwhelming. But, there is this wonderful aura there that captures my interest that I can't explain. All of the people and the shopping and the restaurants....I love it. Maybe it's because my heart and soul is wrapped up there right now.... my main agenda..... my eye is on the prize.

Tonight was my first intramuscular injection, the Delestrogen. We were alittle bit nervous about this one, being that it is given in my hip muscle, but Keith did an excellent job. Everything I've read recently talked about how incredibly painful the intramuscular injections are, so I was worked up and prepared for the worst. No problem for me though...I didn't even flinch.

I just had the greatest orange popsicle ever put on a stick.

Cupcake Crisis

I just thought I'd capture this moment which I solely blame on the hormones. I am having the urge to toss this tray of twelve cupcakes as hard as I can towards the ceiling. Needless to say, there is no cupcake cake. It collapsed, and Keith has been enjoying the pitiful remnants w/Cookies and Cream Blue Bell ice cream.

So, plan B was lemon cupcakes. And they look hideous!!!

Top of my morning

Day #10, January 3, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal Vitamin
Folic Acid Supplement

(CYC D2)

I'm in the process of baking a giant cupcake cake to take to Dallas tomorrow to the staff at SHER. I hesitated taking anything at first, imagining what I would do if I worked in a doctors office, and a patient brought food to me expecting me to eat it. But, after all, it's the thought the counts. Who cares if they toss them in the garbage when I leave? After baking about 80,000 Christmas cookies last month, I packed them up a container full and was surprised that all the cookies were gone by the time I left my appointment. My sweet and thoughtful step-sister gave me a much desired giant cupcake pan for Christmas, and I've been dying to try it out. Mom got one for Christmas too, and she baked one yesterday that turned out adorable. We will see how mine turns out. I'm alittle worried at the moment. It's been in the oven for over 30 minutes, and it's still jiggly and raw. It also has slightly run over the side, so the house is smelling like burning cake. I thought sure I left enough room for rise, but I guess not. Depending on how it turns out, I may or may not post a picture.

I'm so sleepy this afternoon. Mom cooked lunch today, and I think I'm more sleepy now than I was before lunch. Keith mentioned driving down to Lowe's in Ruston when he gets off to look for under-cabinet lighting for our kitchen, but I'm feeling like I'll pass. A nap sounds so much better.

We'll be leaving for Dallas in the morning around 4:30 AM. As Keith said, he'll get to sleep in. I'll be watching a selection of new movies on the way... The Devil Wears Prada and The Holiday. I rented Julie and Julia and The Ugly Truth yesterday, but they are both due back tomorrow.

Day#9, January 2, 2010
Ganirelix injection
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal vitamin
Folic acid supplement

(CYC Start)

Wow, today's the ninth day already! So far, so good. The bubble in the Ganirelix makes me nervous. I lost some of the medication this morning when expelling the bubble, not much....but still. Enough for me to think if the worst happens and this cycle doesn't work, it's all because I didn't take enough. It's a very thick liquid, and it doesn't thin out even when I allow it to come to room temp.

I started counting my calories today on My Fitness Pal. I used this website back when I lost all my weight on Weight Watchers. I love the site. The best part is it's free. I also Turbo Jammed tonight for 20 minutes. My face looked like a beet when I was done, but I felt accomplished.

Thanks to one of my dearest friends e-mailing and asking about our six night Dallas stay that is coming up soon, I thought I'd summarize the IVF process. I forget that not everyone has lived and memorized the process like I have.

Beginning on Dec 25, I began taking suppression hormones (Lupron and Ganirelix) to "trick" my body into not ovulating. These hormones stop signals from the brain which normally trigger ovulation. My ovaries are resting....on a beach somewhere in the Caribbean....just kidding. But seriously, they're snoozing.

Monday, Jan 4.....10:45 appointment @ SIRM (SHER Institute for Reproductive Medicine) in Dallas - Ultrasound and E2 check. Both tests are to check the ovaries to make sure there is no partying going on.

Tuesday, Jan 5 and Friday, Jan 8....E2V Intra-muscular injections (preparing for ovary stimulation.) I'm not 100% sure what these two injections are for. All I know is Keith will have to help with these because the needles are huge, and the shot goes in my hip. There's a trick to making sure the needle actually gets in the muscle. He took notes.

Monday, January 11 thru Sunday, January 17...the fun begins! I begin the Follistim and E2V suppositories. The ovaries should start doing what they were created to do.....except in over-drive. Normally a woman's body makes one egg per month. We're going to hope for at least twenty or as many as God gives us.

Thursday, January 14 - Sunday, January 17 ... add the Menopur injection (another follicle/egg stimulation hormone.)

Monday, January 18 thru Sunday, January 24 - Retrieval week - we'll be in Dallas this week preparing for egg retrieval. I'll have an appointment each morning or every other morning for an "egg" update. Once the clinic says I'm ready for retrieval, there will be a "trigger" injection which initiates ovulation. The next morning, the eggs will be retrieved thru a catheter-type instrument while I'm mildly sedated. Hopefully, we'll have lots of eggs.

Five days after retrieval.....we should know how many eggs fertilized and how many made it to blast stage. Only if a fertilized egg makes it to this stage can an embryo be transferred to the uterus. Our hope and prayer is for at least three embryos to transfer. My numbers suggest I am pre-menopausal, which means my egg quality and quantity is not good. I am on the most aggressive IVF protocol SIRM offers in hopes of getting a large number of eggs, a large number of fertilized eggs, and a large number of good quality embryos to choose for transfer. If we are fortunate and blessed enough to have more than three embryos fertilize and make it to blast, they will be frozen for the future. Wow....amazing.....I still can't believe we're doing this.

Ten days after transfer (God willing we make it to that point,) we'll return to Dallas for our first pregnancy test (Beta#1.) Two days later, we'll return for Beta#2 and hope for our first numbers from Beta #1 to have doubled, tripled, or more. If it does, there are no words that I can come up with now to express just how happy I will be. But, if it doesn't, I'll surely be sad....more like devastated. And at any point during this month....if my ovaries don't respond to the medication, if we have no fertilization, if no embryos make it to blast to transfer......it could all be over. But it won't be the end. I know I'll never be completely prepared the outcome, whatever it will be. That's the hardest part of this whole process....the "not knowing." So...I will continue to cling to what I do know........

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord, "plans to prosper to you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11.

The unending injections, the protocol, the calendar, SIRM, my wonderful doctor and nurse....the whole process and each delicate stage of it is in His hands. God is in control. Our lives and our future baby's life in His hands, and we leave it there. Thanks to all for the prayers, kind words, and thoughts for us during this exciting, overwhelming, and stressful time in our lives. Keith and I are truly humbled by all of the e-mails and encouragement and just the overwhelming interest. Please keep the prayers going up for us everyday as we strive to stay peaceful and hopeful.

*~*HAPPY TWENTY TEN!*~*

Day #7, December 31, 2009
Lupron Injection (LAST DAY!)
(5 units in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal vitamin
Folic Acid Supplement

Day #8, January 1, 2010
*NEW* Ganirelix Injection (possible side effects: skin rash, itching, breathing problems, nausea, pelvic pain, headache, hot flash, bloating)
(125 mcg half dose in the AM)
Dexamethasone tablet
(1 tablet in the AM)
Prenatal vitamin
Folic Acid Supplement

I failed to post yesterday, so it's two days in one today! No real news about yesterday. I must say that last night at Applebees was the first time in a week I haven't cleaned my plate and could actually say "i'm full." I hope maybe I'm finally getting adjusted to the steroid.

Today is New Years Day. I began the Ganirelix Injection this morning. The medication comes in a pre-filled syringe. After searching thru about ten bags of needles, I finally figured out which needle to use. I discovered that each syringe is filled to 0.6 ml instead of 0.5, and each one comes complete with a huge air bubble. Lovely, should I inject the air or do I expel the air? I called the on-call number for my clinic, and Heather called me back immediately and said it really didn't matter since the injection is given subQ (in my tummy) but to go ahead and push the syringe up until the air bubble goes away. So all is well. I'm going to go thru the rest of these drugs this afternoon and pair them up with my instructions and my needles so I won't have to deal with this every time I start a new medication. It's quite frustrating standing in the kitchen w/my hair all over my head in my pajamas early in the morning trying to figure this kind of stuff out, all while thinking of what the monumental effects could be if I screwed something up.

Only two more days until Dallas. We're thinking of going down the day before and spending the night, partly so we won't have to get up so early on Monday to make it to our 10:45 appointment, and partly because I'd like to do alittle shopping. Sam Moon!!! We officially have two hotel reservations made....at the Clarion and at Studio 6. We're going on Monday to tour both and see which one we like the best. The Clarion is $440/6 nights. The Studio 6 is $220/week and has a full kitchen. I'm not feeling too cozy about why the rate is so cheap at Studio 6, but I guess I'll see Monday. K is all about the cheaper part. I just want a comfortable and clean bed, and $220 a week doesn't sound like we'll get either. We saw the Studio 6 from the interstate on our last trip, and it looked newly renovated and relatively decent, but I just don't know.