Hello blog pals! It's hard to believe we are well into January and the new year. As always, we're busy. I went to the doctor last week thinking my blood pressure was high. I started having a dull tightness in my chest last weekend that totally zapped my energy. It comes and goes. Having been on blood pressure medication for about three years now, that tightness is usually a sign my blood pressure is high. After my doctor's appointment and a thorough workover by the doctor, he's sending me to a cardiologist for a stress test. My appointment is Monday at 9:15. I'm sure it's only stress, and the doctor agrees. He feels it will go away on its own, and he prescribed me a week of breakfast in bed. (ha.) He also sent me for additional bloodwork and wants to see me again in two weeks.
Our house is coming along nicely. We are officially back in our bedroom! It's beautiful really...but I'm not finished decorating in there yet, so I'm not QUITE ready to post pictures yet. But, I'm extremely happy with the way it has turned out. The dining room (hopefully baby's room one day) is in progress now. We bumped our IVF up to May. I'm still trying to get excited about it. I hear so many wonderful adoption stories, and it makes me wonder if we're just wasting our time trying IVF again. There is a part of me that wants to let go of the idea that IVF could actually work for us. But there is another part of me that knows all it takes is one good egg, our insurance covers it, so why not try.
I'm still reading up on embryo donation and found a neat website called Miracles in Waiting. They sell ads to embryo recipient hopefuls for couples with extra embryos to see. They basically cut out the adoption process and fees all together, leaving the two couples to make their own arrangements and agreement. I e-mailed the site administrator to see if I would get an actual response from someone and immediately received a response from her with a link showing some of their latest profiles. Much of their site is for "members only," so I haven't been able to tell much about the content. I've also talked to my RE about my clinic's policy on accepting embryos from another clinic. He said as long as the donor couple has undergone the same round of testing for infectious diseases that my clinic requires, they would have no problem at all accepting the embryos for my transfer. If I could just find a couple looking to donate!!! Right now, that's where I'm at. My clinic says they rarely have couples wanting to donate their extra embryos, but that they have a waiting list for couples like us. But, that's as far as I ever get. It's so hard to believe that there aren't couples out there paying astronomical storage fees for their extra embryos to remain frozen in time that don't desire to help out another couple who are going through the same grieving process as they once went through, as well as giving their sweet embies they worked so hard for to have a chance at life.
In closing this post, I want to share a sentence from a paper on Respect that J wrote last week in his English class. His teacher was thoughtful enough to e-mail it to me.
"I respect my parents -- all three of them. I have really lucked out. I have the most kind and loving step-mom."
My life is so tiring sometimes, but that makes it all worth it.